Sunday - Some Peace

I wrote earlier today that I needed to call Hospice to see if I should try to give Dad his meds while he was still sleeping.  The nurse on call said yes, though it may wake him up.  We did, but Dad did not wake up.  Steve then left, and we were sorry to see him go.

After a few more hours, I thought maybe Dad is now comatose, as he was not responding to our voices.  When his next dose of meds was due, I gave it to him, but he did not swallow it (a tiny bit of liquid).  Shortly afterwards, he did a little coughing and gurgling started.  I was afraid he was going to choke, so Dave raised the head of the bed and tried to swab out Dad's mouth, but the gurgling would not stop.  I called Hospice again, and they sent a nurse to see him.  Vivian said he was not choking, what we were hearing is commonly known as the "death rattle," caused by normal end-of-life secretions.  She opened some new medicine from his Hospice Comfort Pack and gave him a few drops which may help dry the secretions, and she also gave him his next round of morphine.

She checked him and said he is in his final stage - he is "actively dying."  He has signs his circulation is shutting down, and although he is easily getting air, his chest muscles are not doing his breathing for him, his belly muscles are.  There are other things I won't detail, but it is all so sad.

She told us to continue the morphine, and to look for any facial frowning, as that will mean he is not comfortable.  Obviously, he cannot speak, but he may be able to hear, so I make sure I tell him I love him often.

Vivian said her best guess is that Dad has 1-3 days left.  I am so glad he finally has relaxed and seems to be at peace.